Thursday, 28 June 2012

Everyone’s story

This used to be my playground
This used to be my childhood dream
This used to be the place I ran to
Whenever I was in need
Of a friend

Passing by our school, I see our playground and every memory blinks a different light in my head, blurring my vision with their watery escape. Friends we made, fought with, waited in the morning to arrive, parted ways every afternoon, right here. Every solace found, every game played, every moment celebrated, every person cursed, every period bunked -too much to remember and nothing worth forgetting.

Why did it have to end
And why do they always say
Don't look back
Keep your head held high
Don't ask them why
Because life is short
And before you know
You're feeling old
And your heart is breaking
Don't hold on to the past
Well that's too much to ask

It's just another phase of life, you have to let go. Every good thing shall pass, making you a better person, life is too short; so relish the times you get and later relish the memories you made. Every time your heart aches with the pain of sweet moments lost in the past, you delude yourself – thank god for facebook you say. We can at least keep in touch. Though you are told it’s no use living in the past, who can really truly move on? Do you and damn, can you, forget the good old times??  You “add” all your old friends, your pillars of strength, in hope that you will never let go – that you will always have someplace where you know solace, friendship, love and open arms await you.

Live and learn
Well the years they flew
And we never knew
We were foolish then
We would never tire
And that little fire
Is still alive in me
It will never go away
Can't say goodbye to yesterday 

Everyday you come online but you barely do much - you play ghost. Facebook laughs at you, tempts you to come in, teases you as you keep track of your friends, tries your moods as you wonder what to tell them, how to tell them that you miss them, and laughs again, more sarcastic than ever, as you decide there’s nothing to say. It’s a daily routine, even though you barely talk to each other, even with the distances in between, you await to see their daily routine of activities, and when you don’t see any likes, shares or comments – you tense, wonder and pray for their well-being. It’s just a little fire in you, a longing for them you can never, and will never, express – it’s something you can’t hide or reveal. You cling onto the only connection left between you two, you can’t say bye.

No regrets
But I wish that you
Were here with me
Well then there's hope yet
I can see your face
In our secret place
You're not just a memory
Say goodbye to yesterday
Those are words I'll never say

And even though you don’t know how much I still care, or you probably don’t realize how intensely I still care, I try to reach out, but you don’t quite catch me. I attempt to remind you I exist, my best friends, my partners in crime - but it seems like you have moved on. Was it really that simple for you? You barely respond inspite of the ease of it, and I wonder if there is any hope for me with you, I worry if I have lost my old friends – hopes shattering through tears in my eyes, the flame shivering in the storms of reality, or perhaps my delusion. I look carefully at your profile again, but I don’t recognize you anymore, maybe a little in bits and pieces - I see familiar patches, but not the same whole. You may have changed or moved on, I may not be as important to you as you still remain for me- but I cannot replace you in my heart, I will continue to pray for you. As realization dawns on me, I cannot distinguish between my friends and these familiar strangers.
One request – can my real friends please raise their hands?

This used to be my playground
This used to be our pride and joy
This used to be the place we ran to
That no one in the world could dare destroy

song credit : madonna 
please be kind, it's my first ever song-fic.


  1. This is beautiful. I swear I had tears in my eyes while reading it, maybe because this is my last year in school and maybe because I think you are true.....all those years of friendship and that one moment when you come you know that it was all nothing.

    Since my father is in army, we don't live at a place for more than 3, I have changed schools almost 5-7 times, don't exactly remember and moving out of a school was like hell, not because I had many friends or anything like that but because I was loosing my teachers. I have never been lucky when it comes to friends, many of them just wanted my, you know I don't care about friendship and all now, I have learnt my lessons many a times.....the hard way. But yes, I have had some friends....just friends who are really nice and I think I am gonna miss them a lot after know they taught me to play pranks. ;P

    Anyway, whatever you wrote I agree with it, and the last question.....well, bang on.

    And I am raising my hand.....(raises her hand high high high and high up so that you could see it from far far away)

    Love you didi.

  2. i see your hand baby,and may you be blessed with the best of friends in the future. missing your friends is one of the hardest things about leaving school. i can still relive my school days and i cry about it every once in a while.
    btw your dad is in the army, my salute to him. i tell my mum i will marry a guy who is in the army or has atleast served in the army,i think i could respect a guy most only if he had served my country.